Last year at this time we were packing up the place in CT, putting our things in storage, and setting off in our little car with heavy hearts to a situation of ambiguity. All we knew is that we needed to keep our new little family intact while we searched for an opportunity to better our circumstances.
And a year later it's no more settled for us. As an example: I installed a curtain in our bedroom a few days ago--8 months after we moved in. My dresser drawer is a cardboard FedEx box. We are still literally living out of suitcases. After a few weeks of steady paychecks Aaron's project was canceled and he is again looking for work. Today he slept most of the day and I did chores. We are careful with each other as though we were china tea cups.
I think we are actually pretty resilient considering we are still in precarious financial straits, we are living in another apartment we dislike, we feel isolated from community. Not such a difference a year makes, and yet we are facing in the same direction now.
Except that in a few weeks our daughter turns two! She is our bright munchkin, asking incessant questions and breaking into dance steps every now and again. She is better than I ever could have imagined; I still can't quite believe I produced such a beautiful, funny, charming creature.
Olivia got sick over the weekend with a cold and an ear infection. She was clingy and quiet most of yesterday. It's been raining for weeks and yesterday was no different. We waited 45 minutes in the doctor's office and the whole time my soggy little girl sat quietly on my lap. She's back to her bouncy self today with the aid of antibiotics.
I am taking things in small bites. I can't seem to again address where to live, how to secure work, what kind of community will I participate in. Aaron naps, I check out by immersing myself in the everyday housewife-y duties, and we remind each other that we will get through this too.
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